Monthly Archives: January 2010

Choose Your Own Drug-Fueled Misadventure: Dragon Ass and Takin’ Names

New column up at Cracked, wherein I completely ignore potential lawsuits and retarded threats from a company that’s two decades past irrelevant and should frankly be thankful that one person even remembers them…in order to make jokes about dongs. The … Continue reading

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How Hollywood Decided to Reboot Spider-Man (Probably)

So the new column is up at Cracked, and in it I discover something unsettling about myself: I am way too good at writing Hollywood dickheads. Considering that I’m moving to LA soon, I am both afraid for my moral … Continue reading

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5 Real News Items That May Be Supervillain Origin Stories

New column up at Cracked, which is ostensibly about headline news articles that could very well be the birth of supervillains, but was in reality just a thinly veiled excuse to write about radioactive bees and call Spider-man a wife-beater. … Continue reading

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Video Game Zoology: How 5 8-bit Characters Would Really Look

New column up at Cracked, wherein I studiously dissect the anatomy, behaviors and functions of several historic digital entertainment entities in order to best describe and illustrate their most accurate and likely realistic form and then I draw some dicks … Continue reading

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